Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Today I am Thankful

Yesterday morning I woke up to some fierce kicks from our little lady. She now wakes up around 6am each morning, ready to run and start her day. Normally, I would roll back over, annoyed, and try to sleep some more. But yesterday it made me smile and gave me this odd peaceful feeling of comfort. It kept me calm and elated for most of the day.

"Road side bombing at the Boston Marathon." 

A quote I'd never think I'd be writing. You never think these things will hit so close to home. They're something that happens over seas. Something only the military sees.

You don't always realize just how horrific something is, until the next day. My ride to work this morning, was my official first cry during this pregnancy. And no, I'm not kidding. I've been lucky enough that my hormones, for the most part, have been pretty much in check. However, events like yesterday, are one of those moments that rock you to the core.

My ride to work always consists of listening to Matty in the Morning for a good laugh. Today they were taking phone calls from spectators, volunteers, and even Joey MacIntyre from the NKOTB, who ran his first marathon yesterday. Each story just made me more upset, and the tears just began falling. When I finally arrived to work, and dried my tears, I came across this quote from Patton Oswalt. I felt compelled to share it, because honestly, I don't know what else to say personally, and I think he said it best.

"Boston. Fucking horrible.

I remember, when 9/11 went down, my reaction was, 'Well, I've had it with humanity.'

But I was wrong. I don't know what's going to be revealed to be behind all of this mayhem. One human insect or a poisonous mass of broken sociopaths.

But here's what I DO know. If it's one person or a HUNDRED people, that number is not even a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a percent of the population on this planet. You watch the videos of the carnage and there are people running TOWARDS the destruction to help out. This is a giant planet and we're lucky to live on it but there are prices and penalties incurred for the daily miracle of existence. One of them is, every once in awhile, the wiring of a tiny sliver of the species gets snarled and they're pointed towards darkness.

But the vast majority stands against that darkness and, like white blood cells attacking a virus, they dilute and weaken and eventually wash away the evil doers and, more importantly, the damage they wreak. This is beyond religion or creed or nation. We would not be here if humanity were inherently evil. We'd have eaten ourselves alive long ago.

So when you spot violence, or bigotry, or intolerance or fear or just garden-variety misogyny, hatred or ignorance, just look it in the eye and think, 'The good outnumber you, and we always will.' "

In the wake of the tragedy, I keep reminding myself that there is a greater amount of GOOD people in the world than there is evil. Knowing we're adding to the world's population, I fear what her future will hold. I fear what she'll see, be exposed to, or have to endure. But I pray that she is one of the good ones.

Today I plan to focus on the little things that bring me joy. Her small kicks. A hug from my husband. A quick message from a friend. I will continue to pray for and think of, all those effected and be thankful that everyone I know is safe and unharmed. I'm thankful that my best friend, who usually runs, is safe in FL in enjoying a family trip. That my other dear friend who usually runs, but was spectating this year, made it home safely to her husband last night. For all those who witnessed the events, that you are able to find peace and a sense of safety again. And for all those who trained for months that were unable to finish, my thought go out to you as well.

Thank you to all those that ran towards the blast to assist others. You are our true heroes and we greatly appreciate your courage.

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