Friday, June 17, 2011

Shall I Write?

I've recently been toying with the idea of writing a book. I am in no way a writer and sometimes wonder if anyone would be even interested in what I have to say. (I know, I write a blog, people read it. So maybe you can all prove me wrong.) Obviously the fertility part would be a large portion of the book, but there's a lot more happening in my life than failing to produce a biological child. And the story of how Hubby and I came to be seems to always be a conversation starter. But how personal am I willing to get? You probably just laughed at that last line, seeing as I continuously share how much cervical mucus I'm producing. But honestly, there are parts of my life I wish not to share. Parts that most people don't know about, things I don't want people knowing about. 

For anyone who knows me, I'm a bit of a control freak. As my sisters would probably say, I'm the youngest and used to getting my way. (Which in my defense, I got my way because I asked. And when you use the word "Daddy" instead of Father, he usually caves. Either that or he was so beaten down by the time I came around, he figured he'd already seen everything.) Whatever the reason, I'm a control freak. I like things my way. So when life started going in the completely wrong direction, I found a way to find some humor in it and learned to let the petty things slide by. And I think that's why I am so happy. In light of everything that has happened in my life, I still smile. I find a way to find joy in the little things because sometimes that's all you have. When life seems to be continuously knocking me down, I can't help but think that my stupid problems are nothing compared to some others. Where does jealousy and anger really get you but locked up in your room sobbing or screaming. Either way, you're probably alone. Well I choose happiness. I refuse to let life get the best of me.  You only get one after all, so why not enjoy it. 

So what's a girl to do...write down her life story or let life slide by and be forgotten? Pretty morbid thought if you ask me. But let's face it, we all want to be remembered in some way. We all want to matter. But I really want to write to at least shed some light on how to be happy in the shittiest of circumstances. If that makes one person smile, or get through a rough time, then it will have been worth it. That's how I want to be remembered.

How do you want to be remembered? (If anyone is even reading this......)

1 comment:

  1. I like it... plus you can always have it not as full fact... you can always put in some "fiction" to it -- and that way people won't consider everything "TRUE" life story. Plus -- everyone has some stuff in the closet. I say go for it.

    How do I want to be remembered?? -- by being that helpful person to someone -- maybe when no one else is. Hence I do what I do -- we all know it isn't for the money. Hopefully I have helped one person with something - and that one thing might completely change their life for the better.